Seeing Out of the Box

Every Mom is given a special gift. It is bestowed upon women when their children are young and is seen as a great gift by her family. It is the gift of sight. I remember as a kid, Mom seemed to have eyes in the back of her head and eyes that could see through walls and doors. How else could she walk in right as I was holding the scissors to cut the hair of her antique doll? Or how could she know my brother and I were sneaking cookies out of the freezer? I was in awe of this special gift but the one I was most in awe of was her ability to find things that were lost. I would search and search for something. She would walk into my room. Glance quickly and say, "If it was a snake it would have bit you." Hand me what I was looking for and walk back out. I stood with my mouth open wondering just how she did it.

Of course, somehow I was bestowed the same gift when I had children. I find myself repeating my Mom's words and telling my kids to "open your eyes, its right in front of you!" But still they can't see it. Perhaps it is not a gift of Mom's but a slow maturing skill of youth. Whatever it is, sometimes when I hear Jesus speak to his disciples, I think he sounds like a Mom trying to make them open their eyes and understand. Jesus saw the world with the eyes of the Messiah, God's son. In the Gospels, we see him trying to teach the disciples there is more around them than meets the eye. He was trying to get the disciples to see outside of their box. And as believers, he is also trying to get us to look outside of our small understanding of the world and to see a much bigger reality.

In the first four chapters of John, we see Jesus expanding the vision of the disciples and other witnesses at the Cleansing of the Temple. "Destroy this temple, and in three days I will raise it up." Or with Nicodemus. "I assure you, unless you are born again, you can never see the Kingdom of God." Then again with the Samaritan woman. "But the water I give takes away thirst altogether." These statements make no sense when viewed within earth's framework. But Jesus is pointing to God's Kingdom and calling those who believe to see something more than what is in front of their eyes. In all of the Gospels, Jesus chastises those around him for not understanding what he is pointing to, something outside the box. He challenges the disciples to open their eyes.

For me, I know when I was living away from God I lost the vision I once knew. When the Spirit within me is leading me, I see things differently. I see the needs of others, not just my own needs. I understand my own attitudes as sinful where before I justified them as necessary. Things I hadn't seen before are now clear as day. Just as Jesus called his disciples to look beyond the earth and themselves, the Spirit leads me to see beyond my own limited world. We need Kingdom eyes, not earthly eyes in order to see all the glorious gifts God has given us which "if they were a snake just might bite us."

For further reading: 1 Corinthians 13:12; Mark 4:10-13

When Job Prayed

Over the past few years, I have skimmed through Job. He is my model for facing the tragedies of life. Ever since I lost what I feared losing the most, Job's story has resonated with me. But my focus has been on how he dealt with what he lost and not on what happens in the final chapter. After all, I knew the end of the story and being cynical or superstitious didn't want to expect my own life to be blessed like Job's. However, as I read and not skimmed the final chapter, I was surprised by two verses.

"I had heard about you before, but now I have seen you with my own eyes. I take back everything I said, and I sit in dust and ashes to show my repentance." (Job 42:5)

Job's words throughout the entire book seemed to mirror my own as I struggled to understand why things have happened in my own life. Why didn't God step in and protect my children from the pain they have endured? Why didn't God protect those who served Him? Even though much of the pain endured was the result of sin, couldn't Almighty God have brought about change and redemption at any point? Couldn't He have restored relationships and changed lives?

In the end, Job has his moment before God and God puts him in his place. The questions of why are not the right questions. Rather, it is the question of "whom." It is not about why God allowed things to happen but about who God is. For me, I have come full circle with God, too. After a couple of years of railing at Him with questions and asking for explanations, I have come to a point where those things are no longer needed. For in the presence of the all powerful and all merciful God the only thing that matters is knowing He is in control. And like Job I can say, "I had heard about you before, but now I have seen you with my own eyes. I take back everything I said, and I sit in dust and ashes to show my repentance." (Job 42:6). In acknowledging God's control, I let go of the burden of understanding and rejoice in the assurance God will never abandon me.

In the past, I thought it was these words out of Job's mouth that sparked the beginning of God restoring his fortunes. But as I read closer I discovered something very different. God rebukes the friends who had argued with Job and required them to make a special sacrifice. And then God instructs Job to pray for his friends who have spoken incorrectly. It is at this point where God begins to bless Job.

"When Job prayed for his friends, the Lord restored his fortunes. In fact, the Lord gave him twice as much as before!" (Job 42:10)

Job's blessing is tied to prayer and not just prayers for himself but prayers for others. For 41 chapters, Job is most concerned about himself and why the tragedy happened. He laments that he didn't deserve such anguish and pain. He wonders why and how he will continue to live in such misery. In chapter 42, we see how Job is re-oriented and the focus moves from himself, to God and then to others. In my own life, I see how God's healing touch has shown me the same thing. When I don't worry about the reasons and accept my place in God's care, the focus moves from myself and onto others.

For Job, it is a two-fold action. First, he prays for those he feels anger toward. These so-called friends called him a liar and told him he deserved to receive the pain he endured. These friends didn't provide comfort for him but added to his pain. So like Jesus will later suggest, Job is asked to pray for those who might be seen as enemies. This is a difficult task for anyone. For myself, it is through God's power alone and in submission to his leading that I can pray for those who have caused pain to me or my family. It has only been recently I have been able to say even the simplest prayer for the ones who have hurt me. And it is only when I am trusting God is in control that I can even think about it.

Second, Job is asked to move outside of his own need and pray for the needs of others. He is called to mediate between God and his friends and bring them right in their relationship with God. Before my divorce, I loved praying for others. It was an honor and a joy to intercede for others, lifting up the needs of others to God. After, I could barely say the simplest of prayers and couldn't pray for anyone. It has been a great joy to me that this love of intercession is returning to my life. I find great joy in praying for others again. I lift up my kids, my friends, and others to God. I pray as I fall asleep and as I awake in the mornings. I honestly thought I would never pray for others again. Now, it feels like a miracle that the desire has returned. God is good.

I would never presume that I will now know the same abundant blessing that God showed Job. Rather, I see Job as a fellow sojourner on a road to healing and wholeness. Healing from bitterness and anger is an enormous blessing alone, how could I ask for more? I have seen God with my own eyes, what more could I ask for? God is good and God is faithful. He is in control.

 

 

Leaving the Water Jar Behind

"The woman left her water jar beside the well and went back to the village . . ." John 4:18

The woman at the well is one of my favorite Bible stories. And I heard an excellent sermon on it yesterday at church. She is like an old friend who I look forward to hearing from again every now and then. No matter how many times I read it, I am intrigued by this lost woman who is found by Jesus. Her life transformed by an ordinary encounter with the extraordinary Christ. Chuck pointed out a line I had never really noticed In his sermon. "The woman left her water jar beside the well and went back to the village." A wonderful visual image of a life forever changed, but it made the practical side of myself come out.

"So what will she do when she needs water tonight to wash the dishes?" I thought, "Sure living water is great for quenching the thirsting soul, but our bodies still need physical water too." And even though she was changed inside, she still lived with a man who wasn't her husband. Leaving him would mean leaving her only means of support and security. It wasn't like she could pack up her belongings and make a way in the world on her own now.

Sometimes I wish the Bible told the stories of the people after they encountered Jesus. Sort of like a Biblical "Where are they Now?" What happened when life turned back to the ordinary? What happened after the Messiah left and the circumstances stayed the same? The challenge for the people Jesus touched in the Bible was no different than the challenges we face in living our lives. How do you maintain the changes brought about by an encounter with Jesus in our imperfect lives? Every Sunday I leave church with high ideals of a life made different by what I have heard and before I know it Monday morning is here and it all flies out the window. How can I leave the water jar behind when I still need water from the well to survive?

For me, I have learned some tricks which help me when the old ways call me back or when I must face the challenge of changing an old, well worn pattern.

1. Recognize the old patterns for what they are – ineffective and destructive. In my own life, when I compare myself to others, I start slipping down the slippery slope into despair. By recognizing what I am doing before I slip too far, I am able to stop the descent and be open to more life giving thoughts.
   
2. Think on what is good and life giving. I have found I need to be concrete in the beginning when I am trying to change my negative thoughts. So I keep scratch paper close by and write repeatedly the positive things I want to remember. Often it is things like: "I am loved, I am valuable, I am God's child" Or it can be scripture or parts of scripture: "God will Provide"
   
3. Fight the good fight and don't give up. This battle can seem to go on and on and on. Sometimes I am tempted to believe I can't win and the old pattern is not really that bad. But then I am reminded not to settle for the old which wasn't enough. It is the water that cannot quench my thirst rather than the living water which will always satisfy me.
   

The woman at the well had to return to her life after Jesus left. While she was transformed by that encounter, she returned to the same house, the same man and the same village. It couldn't have been easy for her. Just like it isn't always easy for us when we know the new way is better but the old way is easier. I have listed a few things that have helped me. But I know there are many more. What are some ways to keep the new and transform the old?